Here's how it went:
Iain, to bear: I want to change you. I'm going to change you. You're a stiiiiiinky boy. I'm going to change you. Stay right there so I can change you. I want to change you. You want to wear the silly pants. (note: his questions sound more like statements, as he hasn't quite mastered inflections yet. Also note: most of the questions required a reply - he was often asking ME, instead of the bear. Later, he'll ask Cory, as you'll see.)
Iain, still to bear: You want to take a baf (bath). I will take you a baf (rather than GIVE you a bath). I will take you a baf. You want to take a baf. (Iain heads for the bathroom. I intercept.)
Me: You can't use the REAL bathtub. How about this pretend bathtub? (handing him a basket. He finds it satisfactory.)
Iain: I will take you a baf in the pretend baftub. I will take you a baf. You want a baf. Is it a good deal. Is it a good deal. Is it a good deal. (this question requires me to say, ad nauseum, yes, it is a good deal. Yes, give the bear a bath. AAARGGGG! Meanwhile, I am trying to cook dinner.)
Finally, mercifully, Iain moves on to Cory: I will take him a baf. (referring still, to the bear, but talking to Cory, who is sitting in his highchair watching. Why Cory had to agree that yes, it was a good deal in order for Iain to get on with bathing the darn bear is beyond me.) Is it a good deal. Cory says yes. Cory says yes. Is it a good deal. Cory says yes.
Cory watches, only slightly amused. I am relieved that I can stop answering.
Iain: I want to take him a baf. Cory says yes..... (finally, I can take no more of the monologue and say, okay Iain, give the bear a bath then. Iain puts the bear in the basket, washes him briefly with a paper towel, pulls him out. I think he may be finished. But no.)
Iain: I gave him a baf. Cory says yes. Is it a good deal.
Seriously, this went on for about two hours. Nonstop. And this morning? Oh yes. It started again.
Note to Iain's future wife: I hope you're a good listener, because this guy likes to talk.
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